


tell me if you feel it too

by aceofdiamonds



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Canon Divergence, F/F, Yule Ball
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-30
Updated: 2015-06-30
Packaged: 2018-04-07 00:40:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,693
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4242921
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aceofdiamonds/pseuds/aceofdiamonds
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>cho sees the yule ball as an opportunity to do something about the feelings she's been having about katie</p>
<p>Sure, she sees the attraction with Cedric with his muscles, his crooked smile, his tousled hair that makes girls stop and stare in the corridors, but she doesn’t feel anything past friendship and respect for him and she’s almost one hundred percent certain that she won’t ever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	tell me if you feel it too

**Author's Note:**

> i couldn't find an answer about hogwarts' central heating system so for the sake of the one line in this they don't have central heating. title is from girls like girls by hayley kiyoko which i've been listening to on repeat for the last 48 hours and which kind of inspired this

 

Cho says yes when Cedric Diggory asks her to the Yule Ball because he’s brave and kind and smart and he looks really happy when she accepts. And then Harry asks her, Harry who has been sneaking glances at her and blushing furiously whenever she catches him for over a year now. This time she has to say no, promising that she would have loved to if only Cedric hadn’t asked her first. She’s not exactly lying -- if Harry had recovered enough to be able to string a full sentence together in front of her she thinks they could have got on great -- it’s just that Cho’s not really that interested in either boy.

Sure, she sees the attraction with Cedric with his muscles, his crooked smile, his tousled hair that makes girls stop and stare in the corridors, but she doesn’t feel anything past friendship and respect for him and she’s almost one hundred percent certain that she won’t ever.

It’s something she’s been thinking about recently. The possibility of girls and all the thrills and excitement that she imagines could come with kissing them, holding their hand, whispering secrets in their dormitories. She’s been thinking about it a lot but has never considered the possibility of saying any of these thoughts out loud. She doesn’t know how people would react past the surprise and possibly disgust. Homosexuality in the wizarding world isn’t discussed at large, instead those known to be guilty of it are discussed behind closed doors, watched in the streets, an open secret to those who are also interested. Cho has no idea what her classmates would say should she show an interest nor her parents.

So she says yes to Cedric and she writes home to her family telling them all about this handsome Hufflepuff Quidditch player who’s competing in the Triwizard Tournament and is utterly charming on top of everything else. For a pretend date, Cho’s picked the best of the lot. Her mum replies on the familiar patterned parchment they bring over from China every time they visit. The heavy material is comforting as she reads the gushing praise from her mum, so happy that she’s got such a lovely boy to escort her to the biggest ball Hogwarts has seen in years. It makes the knot in Cho’s stomach tighten until it’s difficult to breathe but she nods and manages a shaky smile when Marietta leans over the table and asks if she’s okay, she looks a bit pale.

“Just telling my mum about Cedric,” she says, chewing her piece of toast until it’s mush in her mouth.

“I’m so jealous,” Marietta sighs, resting her chin on her elbow and staring down the table to where Roger Davies is sitting with Brooker and Kilpatrick from the team. Cho’s heard rumours about him and the Beauxbatons champion Fleur Delacour. As sad as it is for Marietta who’s had a thing for Roger since second year Cho thinks Roger and Fleur would make a beautiful couple -- they’re both so tall and blond, very aesthetically pleasing. “I’m never going to find a date.”

Cho casts her eyes around. “Terry Boot’s not bad.”

“I heard he’s gay,” Marietta says, her nose wrinkling a little at the thought. It does nothing to ease the tension sitting heavy in Cho’s chest. “And anyway, he’s younger than us.”

“One of the Weasley twins?” Cho knows immediately that that match would not sit well with any participant but from what she’s heard most of the students old enough to attend the Ball have paired up. She wonders for a second about seeking out Harry to see if he would be interested but shuts that down quickly as well. From the limited knowledge she has of him she doesn’t think Marietta is quite his type. “It wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world going yourself -- Sarah and Alicia don’t have dates either, it would be fun to go with them.”

Marietta snorts, picking up her Transfiguration textbook and flicking through the pages as she waits for Cho to struggle through her toast. There’s a week left. There’s still time. Not everyone is as lucky as Cho, as her mother would say.

  
  


.

  
  


The night of the Ball Cho twists her hair up into a bun the way her grandmother taught her over the summer and spritzes _Sleekeazy Hairspray_ to keep it in place. Then she helps Marietta with hers, teasing out her curls into gentle waves and pinning them high on her head. Bradley from the team had asked her to the Ball the other day and although she was wary at first, he’s so big she had muttered to Cho during Potions after he had walked away with a smile in place, she seems quite taken with the idea now, twisting in her seat to make sure her hair is sitting right.

Cedric had stopped Cho outside Charms last week to ask what colour her dress was going to be so he could match his corsage accordingly and when Cho had told him it was a creamy-peachy mix with some patterns on it he had groaned, tipping his head back against the wall. “I was hoping you would say red or something simple.”

“I’m not a simple girl, Cedric,” she had said, smiling a little coyly, feeling like something out of a play. “I’ll charm a scrap of the dress and show you it, would that help?”

“A lot, thanks, Cho,” and then his friends had pulled him away, all of them loud and happy. But he had shouted back to her across the mass of students swarming along the corridor and when she had turned he had grinned and said, “Oh, by the way, the Champions and their partners have to open the Ball with a dance. Better remember your dancing shoes, Chang!”

A couple of younger students nearest Cho had giggled and so Cho smiled at them, gently moving past them to her next class. Dancing is something she’s enjoyed ever since she was little and her aunts and uncles had taught her the traditional dances in their kitchen, her toes skimming the floor when her uncle had lifted her up and spun her around.

When she puts on her dress now she can imagine the way it will float around her ankles when Cedric spins her around the Great Hall in front of the rest of the school, the pattern dancing and moving across her body. The silk is cool and soft when she runs her hands down over her hips, smoothing everything in place. Alicia helps her do up her zip and then turns her back so Cho can fasten the corset of her pink gown.

“I can’t believe you’re going with a _Champion_ , Cho,” Alicia says, her eyes wide when she turns back around to face Cho. “You’re gonna be one of the most important people there.”

Which is an absurd thought, however false it may be. “It’s only Cedric,” she says, because she’s played Quidditch against him for a few years now and even though he’s been brilliant so far in the Tournament mostly she still sees him as the humble, smart boy who has valiantly tried to win Hufflepuff the Cup for the last seven years. 

“We should head down,” Marietta says, checking the clock on her bedside table. “You can’t be late for your Champion,” she teases, dodging the weak punch Cho aims at her. They leave the dorm in a flurry of perfume and laughter, and when they reach the Entrance Hall where Cedric stands waiting, looking very handsome in his dress robes and his corsage that matches Cho’s dress perfectly, Cho thinks that even if it’s not exactly the way she would have dreamed it she could have worse nights.

  
  


.

  
  


“Hey, Cho.”

Cho looks up from her drink to see Katie Bell standing beside her, looking very pretty in a deep blue dress that cuts off just above her knees, the sleeves capped on her shoulders. Her hair falls down around her shoulders, brown and bouncy, and Cho realises that this is the first time she has seen Katie without her hair pulled back in a ponytail.

“Hi, Katie, enjoying yourself?”

She shrugs, scrunches her nose. “It’s alright. Where’s Cedric?”

“Oh, he’s dancing with Fleur at the moment. Something about Inter-School relations and defying the competitiveness expected of them,” she reels off, remembering what Professor Sprout had said when she whisked past them earlier, her arms flapping in Fleur’s direction.

“I see. And who are you dancing with while Cedric does his duty to the school?” Katie grins.

Cho holds her hands out by her sides, tilting her head to the side and smiling. “No one at the moment.”

“Fancy dancing with me?” she asks.

And right here is the beginning of that thing Cho has been thinking about. Right here is where she becomes a little bit more brave and a little bit more daring. “I would love that,” she says, sitting down her drink and following Katie further onto the dance floor. She takes her hand and spins in so she bumps against Katie, laughing loudly when Katie’s arm fits around her waist and turns them quicker and quicker. They pass Bradley and Marietta dancing too slow for the song and then they almost crash into Fred and Angelina who are dancing too fast, limbs flying everywhere. Katie’s hand is warm in her own, holding her steady as they dance in their own private bubble right in the middle of the dance, their smiles wide and their laughter loud.

Cho’s fingers run along the sparkling jewels decorating Katie’s waist, swallowing hard when she takes a second to think about how this may look to outsiders, her date dancing with Fleur and Cho spinning and holding another girl, their dresses floating out around them. She closes her eyes and keeps going, squeezing Katie’s hand and feeling like she’s overdosed on Euphoria Elixir.

  
  


.

  
  


As Cho had started thinking about girls and how she might feel about them Katie had been at the forefront of her thoughts. They’ve never been particularly close, their personalities are so different -- Katie is loud where Cho is quiet, more into sport while Cho enjoys reading on top of Quidditch -- but they’ve been partnered together in classes a few times over the years and they’ve never run out of things to talk about, from their classes to their friends to their contrasting opinions about the beautiful game. So when Cho had begun to examine the way she felt around boys compared to how she felt with girls it had been Katie she had focused her attention. She had thought back as far as second year when she and Katie had both been new to their respective teams and they had bonded afterwards, both young girls in male-dominated teams, helping each other when they had been injured, teasing the other when they had won or lost. Cho had remembered the way she had always been careful when her hand had brushed against Katie’s in class as they passed parchment to each other, the quick spark she had felt enough to make her go quiet and furrow her brow in confusion as to what this could all mean. As she had grown older she had thought more about Katie’s body and how she thinks she would like to kiss her, what that might feel like, and what else they could do together. On the Quidditch pitch Katie is always low on her broom, her body curving and rolling through the air as she weaves between players towards the goal. Sometimes after a game Cho would lie in her bed and think about the way Katie bends, the easy way she smiles, her fingers waggling at Cho across the Great Hall during meals, and she flushes, shame following quickly after, when she takes those thoughts further and further.

She used to question why it was Katie Bell that made her feel this way above anyone else but at the heart of it, she’s the one that makes most sense.

  
  


.

  
  


“D'you want to go outside for a bit?” Katie asks as the second song comes to an end. Her face is flushed, her breathing heavy, her palms sweaty in Cho’s, and her eyes are sparkling like this is the best she’s felt in a long time too.

“Okay, let me just tell Cedric,” but she catches his eye across the room where he’s standing with Scott McNulty and nods when she gestures over to the door, pointing at Katie beside her.

“It’s so warm in there,” Katie exhales, fanning her face once they’ve escaped. Out here in the frosty courtyard it’s freezing; Cho shuffles a few inches closer to Katie, the pretence of keeping warm keeping her secret. “Makes you miss central heating, doesn’t it?”

“Mm. Definitely.”

“Scotland’s gorgeous but its winters are bloody awful.”

Cho’s always preferred autumn above the other seasons but having grown up in Scotland she has grown to appreciate that some years it can go straight from summer to winter and if you don’t wrap up warm by October it’s your own fault when you come down with a cold. Scottish people are resilient against the cold snapping wind and frosty air. “You live down South, don’t you?”

“Just outside Leeds, yeah. You should come visit some time. My brother charmed the garden so the Muggles can’t see when we play Quidditch right in front of their eyes.”

Cho flushes at the invitation but focuses instead on the Quidditch, the main thing she and Katie have in common. “What position does your brother play?”

"Keeper,” and then she frowns. “He hasn’t played much the last couple of years -- with his new job at the Ministry he doesn’t have the time.”

“I better come down then,” Cho grins. “I’ll keep you from getting too cocky.”

“Ugh, Chang, I don’t think I’ll ever forgive you for that win in second year. A beautiful catch, don’t get me wrong, but Merlin, we were so close to that Cup that year.”

The compliment settles inside Cho, warming her slightly. She knows she’s a great Quidditch player and it’s only been bad luck and injuries that have prevented her from winning against Gryffindor since but it’s nice to hear it from Katie, her rival for all intents and purposes. “I can’t believe there’s no Quidditch this year.”

The look on Katie’s face conveys her heartbrokenness over the subject. “Cho, if my teammates weren’t as obsessed as I am and didn’t play at the weekends I think I would go mental."

“But you don’t have a captain,” Cho points out.

“Yeah it’s kinda a free for all. Come next week. Angelina’s really good at warming spells so you won’t be frozen to your broom or anything like that.”

This is the second invitation in as many minutes. This time Cho nods and says, “Okay. I’ll mention it to Roger; him and Bradley have been itching to get out soon. The Tournament’s fun to watch but nothing compares to Quidditch.”

“As always, Cho, you speak my language on this subject.”

Katie leans her arm against Cho’s, her skin cold but not cold enough to make Cho pull away. They sit in silence for a few minutes, catching each other’s eye when Snape and Dumbledore appear on the path, Snape barking points deductions at Samantha Fawcett and Will Stebbins who have been occupying the rose bush across the courtyard. Once the Professors have moved past Katie lets out a tiny exhale and inches closer to Cho on their perch hidden away from the door.

“I heard the Weird Sisters are performing later,” Cho says once the silence has stretched on.

“No way! I love them. My brother took me to a gig when I was twelve and my mum grounded him for a month, saying it wasn’t suitable for a young witch.” Katie laughs at the memory, the air around her wispy with her breath. “What about you, Cho? I can’t see you in their t-shirts and robes, screaming along.”

“That’ll teach you to make assumptions,” Cho retorts, holding her head up primly, but then she breaks, shaking her head. “No, you’re right. They’re okay I would just much rather listen to --”

“Celestina Warberk.”

Cho elbows Katie’s waist at the disdain in her voice, her arm staying and resting against her shoulder. “You must like at least one of her songs, Katie. A little Christmas guilty pleasure.”

Katie rolls her eyes. “She’s so mushy -- Merlin, if I wanted to think about my feelings that much I’d keep a diary.” Cho narrows her eyes, keeps waiting. “Okay, fine, Cho, I love that Cauldron one. It’s so catchy and kinda creepy, actually. I love it. Happy now?”

Snow is beginning to slowly fall onto the ground; from here Cho can hear everyone singing and dancing in the Great Hall, a hush drawn over the noise as it filters out to them. She wonders if Cedric is looking for her and if she should go back in and find him. Instead she tilts her head to look at Katie, a smile spreading across her lips. “I knew it.”

Katie’s voice is quiet when she says. “Yeah. Now you know my biggest secret,” and when her gaze darts down quickly to Cho’s lips, she knows that somehow they’re talking about something else entirely. “Don’t tell anyone, okay?”

“I promise,” she breathes, catching her breath in the cold air. “Can I tell you one, too?”

Katie nods imperceptibly.

Cho closes her eyes and then says all at once. “I really wanted to come here with you tonight.”

“God, Cho, that’s --” Cho opens her eyes and watches Katie blink rapidly. She feels strangely calm, like she’s thrown all her cards down and there’s nothing to now but sit and hope for the best. “Cho,” Katie tries again, and then she gives up and leans in, catching Cho’s lips in a kiss that has Cho trembling all the way down to her toes and then heating her up on the way back up.

“So that was the right thing to say?” Cho says, her breathing shaky and her heart feeling lighter and fuller than it has for months.

Katie rests her forehead on Cho’s, the cinnamon scent of her perfume overwhelming in this proximity. Cho wants to kiss her again. “Why did it take you this long to say it?”

“I was scared,” and she realises she’s still scared but that this feels like it’s worth it, that she would take so many risks for this to continue to be real. “Why didn’t you?”

“I was scared, too.” Katie kisses Cho again, her hand reaching to cup her cheek and hold her close. “I thought once, when you held my hand for too long after I fell, that you might feel the same way but I didn’t hope too much.”

“I think I’ve felt this way for a long time,” Cho says quietly, pressing her lips to Katie’s as once again she thinks back to being thirteen and curious, fourteen and a little more sure. “I was feeling trapped. I had to do something.”

And now Katie smiles, her eyes warm and full of a light that Cho wants to see forever. “I’m glad you did.”

  
  


.

  
  


Cho goes back into find Cedric after another long kiss that has her schooling her expression into something less giddy as she re-enters the Ball. She taps his shoulder and apologises for abandoning him.

“Don’t worry about it,” he says, and she thinks that maybe he understands that for her this was always just about appearances and friendship. She hopes it wasn’t much more for him. He’s a nice boy, she hopes he comes out of this Tournament well, Hufflepuff deserve it, she’s just much more interested in the girl waiting for her over by the giant Christmas tree in the corner. “You had a good time, though?”

“The best,” she assures him, adding. “Thank you for asking me, Cedric.”

He smiles, that one that makes half the school go weak at the knees, and kisses her on the cheek. “I’ll see you around, Cho.”

“Hufflepuff will be sad to lose him next season,” Katie comments when Cho has made her way back over to her. “They’ve been impressive the last few years.”

“I don’t think you should concern yourself with Hufflepuff’s chances,” Cho says. “Ravenclaw’s going to win next year -- worry about us.”

“Yeah, maybe, but now I know their Seeker is pretty far gone for me and I’m going to play up to that on the pitch.”

Cho leads Katie over to an empty table furthest from the stage. At the next table a Beauxbatons student is sitting with Parvati Patil who Cho is sure came with Harry; they look completely involved with each other so Cho doesn’t worry about them overhearing anything incriminating between her and Katie.

“Oh, what are you going to do?” she asks, her foot pressing against Katie’s beneath the table. “Kiss me in the middle of the game?” The thought sends a thrill through her, simultaneously terrified and longing of such a move.

But Katie winks and taps her nose. “I know plenty of dirty tricks -- I might flick my hair seductively or flash you as I grab the Quaffle. I’m confident I can work out your weaknesses.”

“Now you’re giving me ideas,” Cho laughs. “This could turn into quite an interesting game for the whole school.”

“And the reasoning behind it all will be our little secret,” Katie says, smiling like she had outside when Cho had confessed her feelings. “Hey, Cho, this has been the best Ball I’ve ever been to.”

“This is the only Ball you’ve ever been to,” Cho says.

“Still counts.”

Cho rests her hand on top of Katie’s sitting on top of the table, the gesture small but huge in the scheme of things. Katie turns her hand over so she can intertwine their fingers and now Cho smiles, biting her lip to stop it from growing too big otherwise she might never stop.  

  
  



End file.
